Today the sun is out for the first time in a week, I woke with the boyfriend at 7.30am after I very grumpily refused to wake yesterday and stayed in bed till 9.30am. I ironed his shirt and made him coffee and sent him off to work with a new job cold (that we both always seem to get). Then I hung the washing out and although windy the sun seemed to lighten me I’m defiantly a morning person! Yesterday I explained that my up bringing made it hard for me two see the magic in the small and simple things. Well not today my decision to change this is already taking affect, I discussed the same things with the boyfriend the night before yesterdays post and last night I again got in a huff and bluntly asked him is this really going to work is this really enough to last us forever? I then went on to moan and blame him that he didn’t make it better anymore when I was down or alone and he said something that took me back and also made a lot of sense. He said, what if it isn’t that he not trying anymore, maybe the things that used to heal me and make it better don’t work anymore? What if I’ve changed?
Well that took the wind right out of me not that I think he knows it did, but its true we have been together for 4 years now. When we got together we were at college, we were 16 and it was the honeymoon period, all the boyfriend had to do was send me any old text and he was the most romantic boy that ever lived. But we are 20 years old now and have been living together for two years, basically in one room, jobless and penniless. He’s right of course (damn him) we’ve both changed and grown and that is to be expected but I just didn’t see it happening. (Also spending the week watching the T.V. show One Tree Hill doesn’t help because the boys in that are all about romance, long declarations of love and standing up for your lady, is unfair to the ordinary boyfriend.)
Now I realise we’re to old to stand around for hours kissing and texting all night, we have thoughts, and opinions things to talk about, and we discuss politics, directors, films, money and plans. But it’s a shock when you realise that together somewhere along the line we started to grow up and grow together. So last night after this revelation we giggled and cuddled like we used to but I also took care of him because of his cold and this morning, I ironed his shirt and made his coffee and for me he’ll bring me flamin’ hot monster munch, put the washing in the washing machine and catch spiders. This now is our very grown up way very day of saying I love you, because I’d never iron anyone else’s shirt and he wouldn’t put the wash on for anyone but me. So I guess I got my answer in an unexpected way, this really could last the distance if I’m prepared to work and run with the changes. And I can see the magic in the sunshine and the gestures.
Song For Today: Here Comes The Sun – The Beatles.