Saturday night I spent 50 minuets on the phone to my big Sister the only member of my family I could not live without.
We discussed our family and how we wished more than anything that we had the kind of Mother you could go to when the world was falling down around you... we do not however have anyone like that. This made me sad and what made me sadder still was thinking of all the 'friendships' that I have tried so hard to keep. All the emails, texts and phone called I sent and dialled only to receive no reply or call back. All those times I worried, hugged, went out of my way and fixed things for others, family members and friends and received nothing in return.
My family don't believe my wedding day should be an event because they care and think I'm worth it they think it should be an event because it makes our family look good to other people.
But some day long ago I met a boy,
that boy grew into a friend,
that friend grew into a boyfriend
and that boyfriend grew into a man,
I love that man very much,
and that man became my best friend.
He has loved me through fat times, ugly times, screaming times, crying times. He sat all night and watched me sleep while I lost our baby so when I woke up I was never alone. He told me my job we're fools for letting me go, he told me I deserved to go to uni, he takes days off work when I'm sick, he brings the junk food home on sad days, when I'm in depression he makes me talk and go to the doctors, when I can't face another day when I've been put down once again, when family show no love and friends show no kindness and we have no money and live in one room, and I look at him and say I've had enough, let me go I can't do this any more. He says he loves me, he needs me and that the days that are good are so good the bad days should be got through to get to them. He gives me a reason to live, to love and be happy.
So today I got a an interview, tomorrow hopefully I'll get the job, our jobs will pay rent for our very own 1 bedroom flat. In that flat we will plan our very small wedding where we will get ready in the morning together and go hand in hand to the church, where the people that don't believe this will work will be but we won't see them. Because I'll only be looking at him, the man I love, my best friend, he will be my husband and I his wife. We will leave the church as if no one else exists and jump on a train to Paris to get away from the mean people as we celebrate that fact we now have the family I have always dreamed of and one day we will raise children with love but for now some days are better than any fairytale, but on the days it's not we have each other.
Love
Simone
xxxx
We discussed our family and how we wished more than anything that we had the kind of Mother you could go to when the world was falling down around you... we do not however have anyone like that. This made me sad and what made me sadder still was thinking of all the 'friendships' that I have tried so hard to keep. All the emails, texts and phone called I sent and dialled only to receive no reply or call back. All those times I worried, hugged, went out of my way and fixed things for others, family members and friends and received nothing in return.
My family don't believe my wedding day should be an event because they care and think I'm worth it they think it should be an event because it makes our family look good to other people.
But some day long ago I met a boy,
that boy grew into a friend,
that friend grew into a boyfriend
and that boyfriend grew into a man,
I love that man very much,
and that man became my best friend.
He has loved me through fat times, ugly times, screaming times, crying times. He sat all night and watched me sleep while I lost our baby so when I woke up I was never alone. He told me my job we're fools for letting me go, he told me I deserved to go to uni, he takes days off work when I'm sick, he brings the junk food home on sad days, when I'm in depression he makes me talk and go to the doctors, when I can't face another day when I've been put down once again, when family show no love and friends show no kindness and we have no money and live in one room, and I look at him and say I've had enough, let me go I can't do this any more. He says he loves me, he needs me and that the days that are good are so good the bad days should be got through to get to them. He gives me a reason to live, to love and be happy.
So today I got a an interview, tomorrow hopefully I'll get the job, our jobs will pay rent for our very own 1 bedroom flat. In that flat we will plan our very small wedding where we will get ready in the morning together and go hand in hand to the church, where the people that don't believe this will work will be but we won't see them. Because I'll only be looking at him, the man I love, my best friend, he will be my husband and I his wife. We will leave the church as if no one else exists and jump on a train to Paris to get away from the mean people as we celebrate that fact we now have the family I have always dreamed of and one day we will raise children with love but for now some days are better than any fairytale, but on the days it's not we have each other.
Love
Simone
xxxx
Love this post, you go girl! x
ReplyDeletethank you :D I woke up this morning and read your comment on my phone a 'you go girl!' is the best way to start the day lol
ReplyDeletexxxx